Winter time is always a time for me to refocus, reassess, and remember. My curiosity of what is now, and what is to come is always heightened in January and for most of Winter. The year 2019 for me was a lot of letting go. Letting go of unreasonable expectations I had for myself and others, letting go of self-doubt, letting go of things I was holding on to that were interfering with my light. I believe there is light in all of us and that it is easily dimmed by so many things. I felt like I was able to let go of a lot and I feel a sense of lightness and contentment as I embark on this new decade. It feels really exciting! Oh, and did I mention I’m turning 40…
I’ve been told I hold my cards close and I completely agree with that. For better or worse, I am not someone who likes to be totally outward about my personal life and feelings. So, I’ve decided 2020 will be the year of “Letting In”! Being vocal and outward about my struggles and feelings is super vulnerable and scary! In order to do this, I realized I need to get to know myself better. So, I’m diving into astrology, personality studies (enneagram), and love languages. As I’ve started this inquiry of myself I quickly realized I needed to know my own family members in this way as well. Just like there is light in all of us, I believe we all have a nature about us. This is something my Dad has always said. When I would complain about how someone was acting a certain way, he would calmly say, “Well Becky, it’s their nature. You can’t change someone’s nature”. My Dad is very wise and this is the absolute truth! Instead of trying to change my own nature or anyone in my family’s nature I need to understand our natures so I can better communicate with them and with myself.
In addition to learning about our nature, having a better understanding of one another’s love language will help me make sure my family feels loved by me. Each of their languages are different, so I can’t possibly expect them to feel loved if I’m not speaking their language and how would most of us know what makes us feel loved doesn’t necessarily work for everyone. I feel loved when people provide acts of service to me; my husband needs words of affirmation. I’m realizing there is so much information out there about different zodiac signs, personalities, and it’s always been at my fingertips. What the heck! I’m on a mission to dive into all of this information and apply these different languages with my little gang.
For me personally, it’s crazy to read about my own personality or horoscope and have it be spot on in most cases. Hearing some of the negative traits of my personality type is difficult to read, but also eye opening and lets me know exactly what I need to work on. So, “letting in” this year is about knowledge of self and my loved ones and embracing all of our natures as they are. Just as nature itself, we are all perfectly imperfect and that is the beauty of it. Here is a quick brief discovery of myself so far, because you know, I’m Letting In! Some of this is hard to put out there, but here it goes!
Zodiac Sign- Gemini
The Good: Adaptable, curios, and witty
The Bad: Non-committal, easily distracted, and restless (YUP)
Enneagram: The Enthusiast
Dominant Traits: Extrovert, Fun-loving, Adventurous, Upbeat, Friendly, and Optimistic
Basic Fear: To be trapped in pain and deprivation
Basic Desire: To be content and satisfied
Strengths: Loves Making Plans, Imaginative, Positive, Exuberant, Fast-Paced, Spontaneous, Quick Thinker, Multi-Talented, Creative
Challenges: Shifty, Self-Absorbed, Uncommitted, Restless, Compulsive, Indifferent to People’s Feelings.
Love Language: Acts of Service